Sometimes you just need a break. Or sometimes you will be given a once in a lifetime opportunity that you feel you just need to take. Either way (or perhaps in both cases) you might find yourself in the situation where you need to leave your baby with a relative or close friend for a couple days or a couple weeks. If you feel like this is the right decision to make, try not to panic when you fathom the thought of leaving your sweet angel behind. You can make it through this!
Last week I left 11 month old BabyTravels with her Grandma while Reid and I traveled to Tokyo, Japan. We considered taking her with us (she does have a passport) but we thought the 15 hour time change and 12 hour flight would be too harsh on her. I would be lying if I said it was easy, I came back and she instantly remembered me and leaped into my arms as if I never had left. But it’s not true. The whole time I was gone I felt a void in my heart. I felt like a part of me was missing. No, I wasn’t miserable the entire time I was gone, but I did find myself longing for home. I have NEVER felt like that on vacation. But that’s because home is where my baby is.
There were things that I did that made this easier on both of us that I would like to share in hopes of helping someone else out who might be planning on leaving baby for a week. First thing was, I chose to leave her with someone I trusted, someone I know she was comfortable with, and someone who had the time to take care of her. More than that someone who loved her as much as I do. Then I made sure to pack all of her snuggly items, and everything she would need for the week I was gone. I decided to take her down to Grandma’s a few days early so she could get used to the surroundings and get used to her caretaker before I took off. I highly recommend doing this if possible. Or leave your baby with someone they have spent a lot of time with prior.
Our baby is a creature of habit and so to ensure that she would be the most happy and comfortable, I took the time to type out her schedule, preferences, and routines. Yes, I am aware of the fact that this makes me look a little crazy, but BabyTravels likes her schedule (she put herself on it) and gets upset when it isn’t followed.
Leaving itself was the hardest part. Everyone I talked to said you felt better after a day or two but really that wasn’t the case for me. I missed her the whole time, although there were times that were better than others. Mornings and nights were hardest for me. Probably because I pumped and looked at pictures of her. But I did manage to really enjoy myself, get some much needed sleep, and have fun not worrying about naps or feeding schedules.
When I finally got back to my baby it was surreal. I had pictured this moment every second I missed her, and it was nothing like I imagined. I thought she would squeal with delight and reach out to me. But she looked confused and clung to Grandma. After about a minute she realized who I was and warmed up to me and by the time we were in the car she was jabbering and smiling like nothing changed.
Moral of the story is: Don’t be afraid to leave baby with someone you trust to head on a much needed vacation, but don’t expect it to be a cake walk. It is hard but can definitely be worth it. What are your tips for leaving baby behind on a vacation?
Comments 3
I love it. Thanks for the advice!
You are not crazy for leaving a schedule with grandma. I do it for my kids EVERY TIME I am gone, even if it’s only overnight. I also include a list of things they like to eat, what they like to sleep with, and even which shows they like to watch. I think it makes it easier on everyone involved!
I realize this post is over two years old, but I stumbled upon it as I was searching this very topic. If you wouldn’t mind, I would love some advice on the subject. My son is 13 months and still breastfeeds four times every day. He is also very attached to me and has trouble going to anyone else. Because of all that (and also a very energetic and needy four-year-old), I am in desperate need of a break. I have an opportunity to leave for one week with my husband, which is also an area of my life that needs attention.
He is my second child, so I have less reservation about leaving him than I would/did my first. And because I am so desperate I fear I’ll make the wrong decision about going. I don’t have a pump, but have thought about purchasing a manual and storing up milk for the week I’ll be gone? He shows no signs of self-weaning, but I have considered weaning him. I think it would be healthy for him to learn to enjoy his other family (he’ll be staying with a grandparent that I trust fully), but I don’t want to traumatize him. Any suggestions?